What Is Love?
by katzsoa
Summary: The game that the Queen and her Champion played affected more than just themselves... An alternate ending/continuation to Niphuria's "The Language of the Fan".
1. Chapter 1

**A.N.: **This is my ending/continuation to Niphuria's "The Language of the Fan". It begins near the end of the first chapter of the original (if that makes sense...ah well). Hope you enjoy! As always, please review!

* * *

The dormouse stabbed and slashed at the foliage, weeds and grasses taking the brunt of her frustration. She'd been at it for nearly a half hour, but the only thing she'd gained from the intense exercise was sweat. The destruction was doing nothing to satisfy her anger. The thing that was bothering her was not something that could be solved by reducing it to shreds, but she had no other method available to her.

Mallymkun threw her sword at a mushroom with a grunt, and it stuck firmly in the thick stem.

"It's not _fair!_" she shouted at the mushroom, her voice nearing the highest pitch she could squeak in her agitation. "It's just not fair!"

"If life were fair, then I'd be able to nab all of the tarts I wanted from the royal kitchens without worrying about being caught by a cook or an angry, ladle-wielding hare," said a voice from a tree behind her. Mally whirled around to see the Cheshire Cat sitting on a low branch, watching her with a smile that did not meet his bright turquoise eyes, which looked down at her with concern.

"Chessur…!" Mally moaned, finding that she was without the usual scathing comment that she greeted him with on most days. She placed her head in her paws helplessly.

If she had had her sword in hand, Chessur wouldn't have dared come any closer for fear of a sharp stab in the eye. But since she was unarmed, the cat evaporated down to the ground beside her.

"What's eating you?" he asked, and then he winced at his poor choice of words. "I mean…"

"I know what you mean," said Mally, lifting her head and looking up at him. "And you of all people should know what's eating me."

"Well since it isn't me who's suddenly developed a taste for dormouse…"

Mally was not in the mood for jokes.

The Cat sighed. "It's the wedding, isn't it?"

They both knew what wedding he was referring to. Tarrant and Alice's wedding, barely even a week ago. Mally nodded, and then she hid her face again, her body quivering with suppressed sobs. Chessur wrapped his tail around her body comfortingly, and then she gave up the fight against tears altogether, crying into his fur.

The dormouse's infatuation with the Hatter was no secret to Chessur. Even before she'd admitted it to him, shortly after the Battle of Frabjous Day, he had been able to tell that there was much more between the man and the mouse than merely friendship or loyalty between soldiers. Tarrant himself had been oblivious to her affections, and now he was married to Alice, the Overland girl, the Queen's Champion.

"It j-just _stinks!_" Mally sobbed. "I c-c-can't be by the tea table anymore, c-can't see him _looking _at her, and the r-ring on her f-f-finger, Chess! It _hurts _me!"

"Hush, now…" Chessur purred, but Mally was beyond being consoled.

"And it's j-just not fair, Chess! It's not fair, because _I'm _the one who loves him! _I_ do! N-Not Alice! She's in love with the Queen!"

Chessur's eyes widened. Mally clapped her hands over her mouth, looking horrified with herself. She hadn't meant to blurt that out…

"You're certain of this?" the cat whispered.

Mally hesitated, but nodded. "Her Majesty's had me at the castle, training her soldiers," she mumbled through her fingers. "So I've been there, to see… They've been flirting with each other for weeks, so subtly, Alice more obviously, with that Overland fan she's been carrying around…and they've made love. I know it. In the Queen's Chambers."

"But Mirana officiated Alice's wedding," Chessur said. "And she's set to marry the Prince of Purple tomorrow…"

Mally nodded again. "Because she has to," she said. "Because it's what the people want…"

She scowled and wiggled free of Chessur's tail, taking a few steps away from him before turning back, pacing back and forth.

"What _other people _want," she spat. "Why does it have to matter what other people want? Why should love be affected by what other people think? Love is love, be it man to woman, same sex, or even interspecies… Even in Overland. I've looked it up, Chess. In Overland, they'd call Alice and the Queen homosexual and Tarrant and I bestiality, neither of which have positive connotations. But what does it _matter? _It's still love, right?"

She glanced back at Chessur, who shrugged.

"I wouldn't know," he said. "I've never been in love. I'm not even sure if I know what it is. It seems to be an awful lot of trouble, anyway."

"Oh, it _is,_" Mally agreed. "But it can also be the most wonderful thing… What _is _love, anyway?"

She sat down on a pebble and answered her own question.

"Love is caring," she said. "No, it's more than just that. Love is having someone there who you would do anything to help. Love is having someone who can make you laugh one moment and absolutely _gallymoggers _the next, but you can't imagine life without them there. Love is having someone that you can talk to and fight with and cry with and sit for hours and hours not saying anything at all, not even touching each other, just being side by side, and watching the stars. Love is having someone who knows just what to say to make you feel better about yourself, and even when they don't know what to say, they know how to be silent. Love is having someone there who it feels like you've been through everything with, and you want to go through even more with.

"Love is all that," the dormouse asserted. "And Tarrant's been all that, for me. We've shared more laughter and tears than I could ever count. He can be so infuriating in his insanity…but then he'll say something, when everything's going downhill and I just want to stab something, he'll say some so wonderful and sweet… He helped to put me back together after Horunvendush Day, even though he'd lost even more than I had, and after that…after that, _I_ took care of _him_, kept him eating, kept talking to him, even when everything was so hopeless and all I wanted to do was crawl into a hole and lie there until the world ended… We've fought with each other, we've fought alongside each other, and I wouldn't have it any other way…"

She sighed and looked down at the ground.

"I love him, Chess, I love him so much. And sometimes…back in those times when we could just sit and watch the stars…he'd look at me with this smile upon his face, not the crazy smile, a different one. One so warm and…and so rare… Whenever he looked at me like that, everything inside of me just felt so perfect, and I'd think that maybe, just _maybe_, he loved me too, and that he just didn't think that what he felt _could _be love, so he never said anything. I mean, how could it have been love? When the perfect happy ending was standing right in front of him, with her beautiful, human face and her lovely, pleasant demeanor and her heroic reputation, with everyone nodding approval, how could he possibly be in love with a…with a _slurvish _little dormouse?"

"You're not _slurvish_, Mally!" Chessur hissed. "You're not."

"_Am _I, Chess?" Mally demanded, staring intensely up at him. "What if I'm wrong? What if there is no love between Alice and the Queen, no love for me from Tarrant? What if it's all just some mad, selfish fantasy to justify how I feel, to make me think that I actually have a chance…?"

She shook her head helplessly.

"It's not mine to say. It's too late now, anyway. Tarrant and Alice are married and the Queen's getting married herself tomorrow. What I think has no bearing on any of that."

Mally walked over to the mushroom and pulled her sword free, sliding it into her belt.

"I can't avoid this wedding as easily as I did the last one," she said. "I'm supposed to be there, representing Her Majesty's army. Of course, the Champion and Royal Hatter will be there, too… Should be a blast," she added bitterly. "See you around, Chess."

The cat watched the dormouse walk off into the trees, thinking. If Mally was right, and Alice and Mirana were in love, then there was not just one but three females who were doomed to unhappiness by the marriages. But Underland needed the treaty between White and Purple, along with the prospect of heirs to take over the throne in the future, and the Woods needed, as Mally had called it, its "perfect happy ending…"

Which was more important anyway? The needs of a nation, or the happiness of friends?

"This," snarled Chessur. "Is why I never get involved in politics."

He began to gradually fade away, first his tail, then his body, and lastly his ever-present grin as he evaporated away. Before he made a decision, there were a few things that he needed to investigate for himself…


	2. Chapter 2

"You can pick any dress that you desire," Tarrant said, opening the doors of the wardrobe wide to reveal the multitude of colored outfits inside.

"You made all of these?" Alice asked softly.

Tarrant nodded proudly. "Hats are my main forte, but anything from cloth is just as well—but, of course, you knew that!" he added, smiling at his wife, who was still looking at the dresses.

"I wonder whether purple or white would be more appropriate," she said.

"For the wedding?" Tarrant thought. "I would imagine that most of the decorations would be white; she _is _the White Queen, after all. But there's bound to be purple, since she's marrying the Prince of Purple. You, however, would look absolutely stunning in any color that you chose to wear."

Again he grinned at her, and again she did not shift her gaze or return the smile.

"Don't worry," the Hatter said reassuringly. "No one will fault the Queen's Champion for wearing what she likes. Go ahead and try some on. I'll be in my workshop."

Alice nodded, and Tarrant gave her a light kiss on the cheek before leaving the bedroom and closing the door behind him.

The Overland girl placed a hand to her cheek, her fingers touching the spot where his lips had touched it. Her brow was furrowed slightly, as though she were attempting to solve a difficult puzzle. Then she lowered her hand and began to page through the dresses, lingering on some, but always moving on. Eventually she stopped and pulled out a frilly, white dress, very much like the kind that Mirana wore. Alice stared at the dress for a while, her hand again fingering her cheek, and then she crumpled the dress up and threw it across the room, determinedly turning her back on it.

As soon as she'd turned away, she looked back at the discarded gown, wringing her hands in a nervous manner akin to how Nivens McTwisp often did. She slowly approached the dress again, and then she picked it up, smoothing out the wrinkles. Alice sat down on her bed, holding the white dress close to her chest, cradling it, hugging it, as she blinked tears away from her eyes.

Unbeknownst to her, an invisible feline sitting on top of the wardrobe decided that he had seen enough and evaporated off towards his next target.

XXX

Tarrant quietly closed the front door of his house and walked off into the trees, heading down one of the winding paths through the Tulgey Woods. His expression was distant, as though he had no destination in mind, but was letting his feet carry him where they would.

After a few minutes of traipsing, they took him to the old tea table, where he had spent his days keeping up a front of utter madness to keep the Red Queen from suspecting that trouble had been brewing for her in the Woods. The Hatter looked at the table, an expression of surprise upon his always so readable face. He glanced around, but he was alone. The hare who owned the table was absent, the multitude of tea sets unattended.

Tarrant walked around the table, resting a hand first on the arm of his old chair at the head of the table and then on the one to its right, where Alice had always sat whenever she had joined them for tea. He smiled, chuckling to himself as he looked fondly at that chair, apparently lost in happy memory.

Then, the soft laughter abruptly stopped. Tarrant's bright green eyes had shifted back over the table, looking across it at another chair, which had several objects stacked in a slender tower on its seat. The Hatter slowly walked around the table again, his eyes only on that chair as he approached it.

He paused once he stood beside that chair, looking at it with an odd expression on his face. Then he turned back towards the table, picking up a white teapot. He opened the lid and peered inside, but it was empty; there was nothing to see.

"Where are you, lass?" Tarrant whispered, setting the teapot back down on the table again and replacing its lid. "I haven't seen you since…"

His voice trailed off, and he looked around again, this time slowly, searching. When his scan once again yielded no results, the Hatter returned his attentions to the table. He reached down and picked up something tiny, holding it first between his thumb and index finger before setting it in his open palm. It was a miniscule teacup, large enough to hold maybe a few drops of tea at the most. Tarrant stared at the little cup for several moments, a strangely dreamy look on his face.

Suddenly, he dropped the teacup, a look of horror crossing his face. He quickly backed away from the table, his eyes flecked with yellow.

"But I'm not—She's just a—I'm _married!_" Tarrant stammered. Then he turned and ran back into the trees, towards his house.

Chessur materialized on the table, his narrowed eyes watching the fleeing man, then turning on the teacup, which now lay on the table. He nudged at it with a paw, tilting it upright again. Despite its fall onto the hard surface, the tiny cup had only suffered a crack.

"So small, and yet so durable…" the cat muttered. "Just like its owner. He shaped and broke them both, the latter probably not on purpose…"

Such musings would have to wait. Chessur still had one more person to watch, and the royal wedding was less than twenty-four hours away…

XXX

"Your Majesty, we've just received the white roses, and—"

"Will this be enough seating?"

"Would Your Majesty prefer cream of mushroom, or—"

"—Purple Court is here, shall I show them upstairs?"

"Yes, yes…" Mirana waved the questions away as she walked down a hallway of her castle, which was quite hectic. Courtiers, servants, and chefs seemed to be everywhere at once, putting up decorations, setting the menu, and handling all sorts of other details that needed to be dealt with before the next day's wedding.

_Her _wedding, to Raymond of Purple.

The White Queen slipped into a side room, one empty of other people for the moment. She glanced around carefully before walking up to a little table, placing her hands on it, and twisting the tabletop ever so slightly to the left. The wall nearest to her slid open, revealing a dimly lit passageway. Mirana quickly entered the passageway, and the wall slid shut behind her.

She sneezed. The dark corridor was very dusty, as though it hadn't been used for a very long time. This did not appear to discourage her, however. Mirana walked down the passageway, which twisted and turned around the rooms of the castle. Once in a while, the clamor of dishes and voices was heard as she neared more wedding preparations, but she always passed these by.

The dark hallway sloped downwards, and soon it became evident that Mirana was beneath the castle itself. She came to a small room, which was furnished by two chairs and a bookshelf, which was full of old, dust-covered books. Mirana sat down in one of the chairs, staring at the wall.

Soon, hurried footsteps sounded, drawing nearer. Mirana tensed and went to stand up, but she relaxed when she saw that it was Nivens McTwisp entering the room.

"Is everything all right, Your Majesty?" the rabbit asked. "I just happened to notice that you had vanished from that room, and…"

Mirana smiled and shook her head.

"Thank you for your concern, McTwisp, but I only desired some time alone."

"Quite understandable, given the circumstances," McTwisp said, nodding. The queen said nothing in response for several moments as she slowly looked around the little room.

"Of all the people in Underland, only four know of these hidden halls," she finally said, her voice hushed. "Myself being first, and you, whom I told during the war. Absolem is third, but he knows everything. The fourth is my sister."

Mirana sighed. "These secret rooms were meant for our protection, but they became our playground. I can still recall running through these halls, hidden from the rest of the world, playing hide-and-seek and other childish games… That was before she changed…before _I _changed…before the world stepped in and made everything official and proper, and began to expect things of us…

"The number will go up to five, soon. I will have to tell Raymond; these halls exist for the protection of the royal family, after all. I only wish…"

She hesitated, and when she spoke again she was even quieter than before.

"I only wish that the fifth had been _her_, instead."

There was sadness in the queen's eyes, and sympathy in the rabbit's.

"There was so much to tell her," Mirana continued. "So much of myself that I wanted to share with her…to _give_ to her…but now, now there is no chance to."

McTwisp shrugged."Well, it is the queen's duty to marry, to provide treaties and heirs—"

"You do not need to remind me of my duties, McTwisp," Mirana cut him off. "Haven't I gone over them enough, searching for some loophole, some legislation that I could use to justify following my heart? It is what the world expects. As much as it pains me, I have no choice but to comply! Regardless, what's done is done. Alice is married, and I'm as good as. Wishing will do me no good; the best option—the _only _option—is to move on."

It sounded like she was trying to convince herself, more than to tell the rabbit.

The queen stood up. "I'll be in my chambers," she said, turning and walking out through a doorway on the other side of the room.

McTwisp watched her leave, and then he turned and nearly jumped out of his skin at the sight of the Cheshire Cat sitting behind him.

"Oh my goodness!" he gasped. "What are _you_ doing here?"

"Espionage," Chessur replied.

"That is to say, eavesdropping," the rabbit corrected, trying to slow his pounding heart.

The cat shrugged. "Call it what you wish. It's necessary, nonetheless."

"Necessary?"

"I've decided that I disagree with the impending union between our queen and the Prince of Purple," Chessur explained. "A view that I believe you share. On behalf of the needs of our queen and her champion, this wedding should not occur."

"But what can we do?" McTwisp asked. "We're talking about the needs of a nation. This isn't just some easily fixed squabble between lovers, like in those romance novels the queen keeps in her library, in which everyone gets to be with their true love and lives happily ever after."

Chessur's grin widened, but whether it was from delight or deviousness the rabbit could not tell.

"You'd be surprised," he purred, beginning to fade away.

"What are you planning?" McTwisp asked. "Chessur, wait!"

But the cat was already gone, and the rabbit was talking to thin, dusty air.


	3. Chapter 3

Mally lifted her paw from the stream, sprinkling water onto her face, trying to compose herself.

_Come on, Mally. Let's go. You have to get to the castle, and you can't look like this when you get there. Think about the Queen's wedding, not about _him_. Think about the treaty with Purple, not about _him_. Think about the good that this day will bring, not about _him_. Think about the future, not about… Not about…_

_Not…_

**XXX**

Mallymkun looked up to see the blue-gray cat watching lazily from a tree branch. In her mind, surprise slowly began to turn into fury.

"Good morning, Chessur," Bayard greeted the cat. "Mallymkun, Tarrant, this is Chessur. Chances are he knows who you are, even if you haven't met—"

"Oh, we've met," Mallymkun snarled.

"Really?" Bayard raised an eyebrow questioningly. Tarrant stood up and came around the tree to where they were standing.

"Two days ago," the dormouse said, glaring up at the cat, who was gazing back unconcernedly. "Only a few minutes before the Jabberwocky attacked. He _knew _it was going to happen, too!"

"What!" the Hatter exclaimed, glancing up sharply at Chessur.

"He said to me, 'the party's going to end early,'" Mallymkun told him.

"'Earlier than expected,'" the cat corrected, idly licking a paw and smoothing back his fur.

"You _knew!_" Hatter yelled. Thackery and several other animals turned to watch, attracted by the commotion. "And you didn't try to warn anyone?"

"I really didn't think that it was any of my business," Chessur said nonchalantly.

"None of your _business?_" the dormouse and hatter shouted simultaneously, unable to _believe _the cat's indifference.

Chessur shrugged. "It's not like what happened was my fault."

The Hatter roared and lunged at the cat, whipping out a pair of scissors from one of his pockets and stabbing at the feline, who vanished before the blades touched him. Hatter yelled again furiously, whirling about, searching for Chessur. Mallymkun leapt out of the way of his feet. Bayard barked at Tarrant, but there was no response. The man seemed to have completely forgotten where he was. With his target gone, he slammed around wildly, yanking branches off of trees and forcing the other animals to flee in fear.

Mallymkun didn't run. She saw that his eyes were golden again. This was not the sad, quiet man she'd found in the wreckage of their hometown, not the man she'd shouted at, who she'd taken out her grief on. This was something else.

_He doesn't know what he's doing, _she realized. This total senselessness absolutely terrified her.

"Hatter!" she screamed. "_Hatter! Stop!_"

And he did. He froze in place, blinking at his arm in confusion, which was raised over his head to strike an unseen foe. Very slowly, he lowered his arm and turned to face Mallymkun.

"What just happened?" he whispered.

"Are you all right?" Mallymkun asked.

Tarrant nodded. They both were trembling, the two of them now alone in the clearing, not thinking of the treacherous cat or even of what happened two days previously, but of the event that they had just been witness to. Green eyes looked deep into brown eyes, and they stood without saying a word. Mallymkun thought that it was like the two of them had walked in on each other while naked, and were seeing things that had been previously hidden.

"I'm mad, aren't I?" said the Hatter. "I was so angry…and now…"

Mally shook her head. "I don't…"

Returning footfalls snapped both of them out of the mood that had held them so still. Mallymkun ceased her trembling with a thought, appearing completely composed once more. She tore her gaze from the Hatter's, silently cursing her moment of complete openness to this man and vowing to keep herself even more tightly closed. It would be best to just forget the incident.

**XXX**

The dormouse pulled herself up onto the windowsill, where Tarrant stood, looking through the window and up at the sky, which was dark, deep, and dotted with thousands of twinkling stars.

"Good evening," said the Hatter.

"Evening," Mally replied, sitting down, at shoulder-level with him.

"Do you know the old stories of the stars, Mally?" Tarrant asked.

The dormouse nodded. "But I don't remember much. It's been too long, and there are so many…"

Tarrant nodded. "The Great Dragon's bright tonight," he said, pointing up at a long coil of stars that spiraled through the sky. "And Yuru the Horsefly, and Champion Ganthiyis…"

Mallymkun's eyes scanned the sky, picking out shapes that she vaguely remembered hearing stories about when she was little, back when she'd snuck around in human houses, trying to discover what her parents feared of the outside world.

She shuddered at the memories, which were too painful to recollect, now that not only her parents and the houses but also her entire family and town were gone. It had been many months since… Months of living under the Red Queen's rule, months of waiting for a Champion, months of feigning madness to stay alive.

The Hatter noticed her momentary tremble, but said nothing, turning his gaze back to the sky as she recomposed herself.

"I wonder why there are no mice in the stars," Mally said, trying to bring herself back to the present without revealing that anything was off.

Tarrant shrugged. "There may be one or two that we don't know about," he said. "But if not… It might be because the best one's still on the ground."

Mallymkun glanced over at him, eyebrows raised. The Hatter just smiled at her in response, the moonlight making his green eyes gleam.

Something squirmed inside the dormouse's chest, and although it was a cool night she suddenly felt very warm. She pulled her gaze away from his and back to the sky.

The man and dormouse stayed there for a long time, side by side, silently watching the stars.

**XXX**

Mallymkun turned and scurried back out into the hallway, trying the next room over. It would be dawn soon, and then getting back out of Salazen Grum would be much more difficult…

"Tarrant!"

There he was, sitting and staring listlessly out the window. He turned at the sound of the dormouse's voice, and his face lit up.

"Mally!" he gasped. Then he frowned. "What are you doing here?"

"Rescuing you, of course!" Mally ran over to the Hatter's feet. One of his legs was chained to the wall, but there was a lock near his ankle…

"I thought I told you to stay at the tea table," Tarrant scolded as she stuck the tip of her sword into the lock, trying to pry it open.

"Since when have I ever taken orders?" the dormouse grunted as she tugged at the lock.

"The Red Queen's furious about something, Mally! Heads tend to roll when she's furious."

"Well, we'll just have to make sure yours isn't one of them."

Tarrant shook his head and sat down again. After about a minute of tinkering, the lock was still intact, and through Mally's frustration she heard approaching footsteps.

"Get out of here, Mally!" Tarrant hissed.

"No," was the stubborn reply.

"I'm not letting you get caught."

"I'm not leaving you."

"Mally, you—"

"Tarrant, I—"

They glared at each other.

"Not leaving," Mallymkun repeated, getting back to work on the lock.

"Stand back, Mallymkun!"

Alice ran into the room, raising the Vorpal Sword above her head.

"How's this for muchness?" she challenged.

_She's got the sword! _Mally's eyes widened and she backed out of the way as Alice aimed to bring the blade down on the chain.

"No, no!" Tarrant said. "It mustn't be used for anything b—"

The doors slammed open, and in came the Knave of Hearts, flanked by two Red Knights. Mally tensed. _Oh no…_

Stayne hadn't seemed to have noticed the dormouse yet, though. "Arrest that girl for unlawful seduction!" he ordered, pointing at Alice, who swung around, pointing the Vorpal Sword at him.

"Hatter…!" Mally gasped.

"Take it to the White Queen!" the Hatter urged Alice, standing up.

"I'm not leaving without you!" Alice protested.

"Go!"

Tarrant grabbed two rolls of fabric and tossed them at the cardsmen, knocking them to the ground.

Stayne drew his sword and approached the Hatter, who reached for a hat stand to defend himself with, but his chain pulled tight.

_It's caught on the table! _Mally thought, hurrying to free the stuck links. She pulled them free just in time for Tarrant to grab the hat stand, clashing it against Stayne's sword. Mally drew her own sword, and ran forward, but she only ended up having to dodge the hat stand as it was thrown to the ground. She looked desperately for an opening, some way to help the Hatter…

_And why is that girl just _standing _there? She's got the sword, what's she waiting for?_

"Run, Alice!" Mally shouted.

Everything seemed to freeze, and the consequences of what she had just said hit her. Alice had been walking around the castle unopposed. Which meant that the Red Queen and Knave hadn't known that she _was _Alice. Which meant that Alice could have probably escaped with little to no problems, and have gone on to the White Queen's castle…

But now, she couldn't.

Mally clapped her hands over her mouth, but it was too late.

Stayne's eyes widened, and he grinned with an eeriness that could have rivaled a Cheshire Cat's.

"Alice…" he said.

"Run!" Tarrant croaked.

_Now _Alice ran, fleeing down the hall. Tarrant sprayed perfume in the Knave's face, and Stayne stumbled backwards, rubbing at his eyes and shoving the Hatter to the ground.

"Seize her!" Stayne called to a group of Red Knights who were marching by. "And you two—apprehend them!" he added to the two cardsmen who had just regained their footing, pointing at the hatter and dormouse.

One of the cardsmen hurried forward and pinned Tarrant to the carpet, grabbing his chain.

"Get _off _of him, you!" Mally shrieked, running up and throwing her sword at the one part of the cardsman's body that was not covered by armor—his eye. The blade stuck, and the Knight yelled in pain, one gauntleted hand hitting Tarrant in the face as he flailed, yanking the tiny sword free and covering his eye with the other hand.

Mally was suddenly snatched up from the ground by metal fingers as the other cardsmen took advantage of her unarmed state. She tried to bite him, but it only hurt her teeth, and then the Red Knight's fist began to tighten.

"You—Tarr—No—" the dormouse gasped as the air was squeezed from her lungs. She tried to struggle free, but she couldn't move her agonizing limbs, and her vision was being blocked by little black dots…

"_No! _Let go of her!"

Was that Tarrant's voice, echoing from somewhere far away, as the black dots surrounded Mally completely?

"Not Mally! Not like this! _Let her go!_ _Mally! Please!_"

Suddenly, the painful pressing ceased. Mally gasped and coughed as air reentered her lungs, stinging her insides. She tried to look around, but she was too dizzy, and she closed her eyes tight as she felt herself fall from the metal fingers onto warm flesh.

"What difference does it make?" a low voice muttered. "You're both doomed anyway."

Mally felt a finger gently stroke her side, and she clasped her paws around that finger, holding it tightly to her, not wanting to ever have to let go.

**XXX**

Mally stared up at the White Queen's castle, hesitated, and went inside.

**XXX**

**A.N.: **The first flashback is from another fanfic of mine, "Dormouse," with a few edits, and the third one is (mostly) from the original movie.


	4. Chapter 4

Tarrant stood in the crowded room of the White Queen's palace, waiting for the chapel doors to open and the royal wedding ceremony to begin. Alice had gone ahead; as Queen's champion, she would stand right at Mirana's side while the vows were exchanged.

_She's been very quiet today… very quiet a lot lately, now that I think about it. Why didn't I notice it before? Well, if she's still troubled after the wedding, I'll ask her._

An invisible hand tapped the Hatter's shoulder.

"Might I have a word?" Chessur asked, whispering the question into Tarrant's ear.

The doors opened, and the other guests began to enter the chapel.

"If it's a quick one," Tarrant replied.

"Let's step in here, shall we?" the Cat suggested, materializing in front of a nearby door and opening it to reveal a small side room.

"What do you want, you skulking cat?" the Hatter asked as he followed Chessur into the room. "I highly doubt the Queen invited you to her wedding."

"Insults will get you nowhere, Tarrant," said Chessur. "This is serious, and for the good of you and the people closest to you, you'd be wise to listen."

The Cat _was _serious, more serious than Tarrant could ever remember seeing him before.

"What's going on, Chess?"

"Haven't you ever doubted, Tarrant?" Chessur asked, choosing his words carefully. "On anything, I mean. Haven't you ever doubted that what the majority said should be was the right thing for the people involved? That the safer, easier option was the truly best one?"

Tarrant frowned. "What do you…"

Then he hesitated.

"You've made a mistake," Chessur said.

"I… I don't know what you're talking about."

"I doubt that," said Chessur. "How happy _is _your marriage, really?"

"As happy as it could be!" Tarrant snapped. "How _dare _you say that—"

"There's a rodent in that chapel who is barely holding herself together," Chess interrupted.

"Mally?" Tarrant gasped, his emotions turning on a dime. "She's here? Where has she been? What's happened to her?"

"That's not as important of a detail at the moment," Chessur said. "What matters now is that you _don't _have the perfect happy ending that you think you do."

Tarrant glared at him.

"What. Do you have. To say."


	5. Chapter 5

**A.N.: **I suck at writing Scottish accents. Just imagine it's actually there, please. Also, this is another short chapter. They might all be short from here on out; I'm not exactly sure.

**XXX**

The dormouse was close to giving up on her pretense of internal pep talks, which weren't working. Busting out crying in front of everyone wasn't an option, however, and neither was fleeing the chapel, so she was at more than just a bit of a loss as to what _to _do.

There was the White Queen, looking even more beautiful than usual as a bride, walking down the white carpet towards Raymond of Purple and her Champion at the altar.

_Mirana looks so happy… _Mally thought. _Everyone looks so happy, not at all like people are marrying the wrong partner… Maybe it's just me, after all. Maybe I've imagined this whole drama. Maybe I _am _mad._

This, of course, did nothing to help her resolve to stand strong. Mally was pretty sure that she was trembling, but it was difficult to tell. She cast her eyes around the room, looking for something, anything, to distract her from her troubles.

What she saw was McTwisp, who had an oddly somber look on his face, unnoticed by the other guests, White and Purple, who had their eyes on the royal couple-to-be.

_There's only one reason why someone would be upset today, _Mally thought. _He must know how things really are! But do others know? How many? And why doesn't someone _do _something?_

Suddenly, as though in response to her silent, desperate plea for change, the doors at the back of the chapel slammed open again, and another figure came striding up the white carpet. All heads turned to the newcomer, making it difficult for the petite dormouse to see, but as the man passed by her, she shuddered.

It was Tarrant, and his eyes were near orange in shade. Mally had seen him this angry maybe twice before in all the years she'd known him.

The hatter marched right up to the altar, and although he was now facing away from the dormouse, she felt that she could imagine the livid expression on his face from the heavily accented tone of his voice.

"Stop right there."

There was a general murmur of confusion in the room.

"There'll be no wedding," Tarrant ordered. "Not until one thing is settled."

"Now, see here—" Raymond attempted to interject.

"Not a word out of you!" Tarrant snapped, cutting him off with a sharp glance in the prince's direction. Raymond shut his mouth, glancing over his shoulder for guards to take the madman away.

The hatter turned to Alice. "Is it true?" he demanded.

"…Is what true, Hatter?" Alice asked; her voice was barely above a whisper.

"Is it true, the things that that _slurking _cat's just told me about you and the Queen?"

Mally gasped. _Chess, what have you done?_

"He says that you two are _lovers_," Tarrant continued. "That you still love each other, despite your marriages! That you love _Mirana _instead of _me. _Now. Is. It. _True?_"

There was a silence that seemed interminable to Mally, in which the statement was neither affirmed nor denied. Alice's face was blank, but Mirana seemed near complete despair.

Finally, Alice bowed her head, as though she could no longer look Tarrant in the eyes.

"I'm sorry, Hatter," she whispered. "I tried…"

It was barely hearable, but it was enough. Tarrant turned and strode out of the room, and Mally caught just a glimpse of his face, his confused, distraught expression, before Raymond did the same, with the Purple courtiers following him, and the room erupted into confusion and disorder.

In all the chaos, no one noticed the dormouse running away, tears streaming down her furred cheeks.


	6. Chapter 6

Mallymkun was curled up as small as she could be, silently sobbing into her sleeves, which were very damp now, but she couldn't bring herself to care. Nor did she care that she really didn't know where she was. She was in a wall, somewhere in the White Palace. Not even the castle was free of mouse holes.

It had been years since she'd hidden like this. It was pathetic, she knew it, but she didn't care about that, either.

Everything was ruined. The alliance with Purple, the people's trust in the Queen and her Champion…gone. And Tarrant, Tarrant was hurt…heartbroken…

Mally wanted to blame Chess for spilling the beans to Tarrant. She wanted to blame Alice and Mirana for having an affair in the first place, and for starting the web of deceit. She wanted to blame McTwisp for not stepping in and having things dealt with more efficiently. She even wanted to blame Tarrant, because he'd been so dense and hadn't seen that there was a problem at all…

But she couldn't. She couldn't blame anyone for not solving the problem.

Because it was her fault that there _was _a problem at all.

_Stupid, slurking, slurvish dormouse… Couldn't have just kept my mouth shut and accepted that what was lost was lost… Couldn't have just let things go, no, I had to ruin everyone's happiness… What do I get out of it, anyway? Nothing. Nothing! And I don't deserve anything!_

_Happy and with Tarrant, that's what I wanted. Ha. I'm just a stupid, selfish, lovesick little dormouse! I'm irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. What I think doesn't matter; what I want doesn't matter. What I want makes others unhappy. I don't do any good._

_I deserve to be unhappy and alone._

The tears continued to flow.

Then the dormouse heard hurried footsteps, and a slamming door.

And then there was a gasping sob.

Mally lifted her head slightly. Someone else was there, in the room that this wall bordered. Someone else was crying. Who?

It wasn't long before the door opened again.

"Alice…" a voice whispered.

"G-Get away from me!" another protested.

Footsteps again. A pause.

"How… How _dare _you come after me now!" the sobbing voice, _Alice_, said. "After all this… You led me on, you…you pretended that my love meant something to you, and then you turn your back on me! It was your intention all along, to marry a prince, wasn't it? You should have said so from the start! Why set me up for hurt, Queen of White?

"I almost thought you made amends, marrying me to Hatter," Alice continued, her voice increasing in pitch and intensity. "I could have found happiness with him—" Mally's head fell back into her arms. "—but now that he knows, he'll never take me back! And I could never go back, not now, not ever, because I could never pretend again. I could never pretend that I was over you again, because I'm not. I love you. You hurt me, but I love you. You broke my heart, Mirana. And now here you are. What do you think you're going to do with the pieces?"

There was another pause.

"Whatever I can," Mirana replied, her voice so soft it barely reached the hiding dormouse's ears. "Whatever I can do, to fix the mess I've tangled us up in… It would be so much easier, if I weren't Queen…"

"Easier." Alice spat the word. "You want the _easy _way out—"

"Alice, please." The Queen barely raised her voice, but she still managed to cut her Champion off.

"I expect you to believe anything that I say," she continued. "But I promise you, I never pretended anything to you. Your love meant the world to me. I wanted… I _still _want only to love you, my love. But the people expected me to choose, and I… I was torn, Alice. My life has been for the kingdom, for my people, for what's best for them. My art, my vows… It's all been for Underland, never for me.

"Then you came along, and suddenly I wanted something for me. Someone for me. Someone who wanted me in a way that no one else had. That someone was you. I've never wanted someone for me, Alice. It's all been for Underland. All for the people. May I ask you to try to understand that? To understand that I didn't think I had a choice?"

Mallymkun hardly dared to breathe in the silence that followed, so anxious was she to hear what happened next. The quiet seemed interminable, but then Alice spoke.

"You had no choice," she said in a voice with an unnerving, dead quality. "It would be wrong of me to restrict my love. There's a world for me above us. I'll leave Underland. For you. So you'll be free to do what's best for your people."

Footsteps. The rustle of fabric.

"Alice, wait."

"Let go of me, Mirana."

"Please listen."

"I've heard enough."

"Is not what the Queen wants law?"

"Is what the Queen wants what is best for her people?"

"Is the thing that is best for the Queen and her love what is best for her ability to rule her kingdom and her people, and therefore best for her kingdom and her people?"

A pause.

"Your words attempt to twist laws."

"I'm government, Alice. It's what I do."

"And you couldn't have before?"

"I didn't think I could."

"You should have, then. This is now. Mirana, let _go_."

The sounds of a struggle slid through the wall.

"Alice, no… Alice… _I have no choice!_"

"Then let me go, and find yourself a prince who will take you now!"

"Not on that, Alice! Not on me marrying a prince! That's over! That's not the thing that I have no choice on anymore!"

The struggle stopped.

"Then… Then what is?"

"Alice…I love you. Letting you leave is not an option, not while I have a chance, however slim, of proving it to you. Being separate from my love is not an option, not anymore. On _that, _I have no choice."

A pause.

"…but what about what the people want?"

"What the people want should be their ruler's concern. The White Queen shall do her best by them. If they wish to find someone else, then so be it. The White Queen will rule, but Mirana wishes to love her love."

"Mirana is the White Queen," Alice pointed out.

"I don't think that that takes precedence anymore, Alice. I did. Now I don't."

Silence.

"You asked me what I thought I was going to do with the pieces, Alice. There are so many pieces: of you, of Tarrant, of my people, of Purple… I want to stand by my love while I try to put the pieces back together. I can't hope to put them back in exactly the same way that they were before…but I can try to put them together in a way that they are no longer broken. And the first pieces that I want to put together are you and me. I want them to stay together throughout the fixing.

"Now," Mirana continued. "Here's one piece, my piece. Will yours come together with it?"

Silence again. Then, suddenly, there was the sound of quick movement, and then of two people bursting into tears.

Mally tentatively stood up. There was a crack in the wall, just above her head level. She stood on the tips of her toes and peered through it.

She saw the two women in each other's embrace.

Something inside her stomach squirmed.

Was it happiness for them and hope for the future that she felt, or was it simply jealousy of the love that they had?

She couldn't trust herself to be sure.

The dormouse ducked under a support in the wall and crept away.


	7. Chapter 7

The Cheshire Cat was trying to decide whether or not he would let Mally beat him up. He'd known better than to approach her at the wedding; he'd seen her run off yesterday in tears. No doubt she'd recovered enough by now to seek him out, and probably for revenge.

If she _was _angry with him, which was what he expected, did he deserve it?

_I did what I thought was right, _Chessur thought, licking a paw. _So I'm fine there._

He wasn't one to second-guess his own actions, after all. It was a much easier way to handle problems. Other people, however, second-guessed him often.

Of course, there _was _the possibility that Mallymkun _wasn't _mad at him. When he'd comforted her before, she had been very self-depreciating.

She might be mad at herself, now that everything was a mess.

_But it had been a mess before! Now it's…a different mess._

Either way, he was waiting for her outside of his tree-stump house, not sure whether he should evaporate away when she appeared or sit through whatever happened next. The one thing he was sure of was that she would come. The dormouse could be very predictable when she was upset.

_The rest of the time, however… _Chessur chuckled softly, thinking of the wild whirlwind of a rodent, always ready for action and eager to prove herself.

That was the Mally he hoped to bring back.

"Don't know what _you're _laughing about," the dormouse muttered, coming around the stump.

Chessur turned his head to face her as she pulled herself up onto a root of the stump and sat. Her fur and clothes were dirty, and there were dark circles under her eyes, which Chess barely glimpsed before she let her head hang down over her chest.

"You look terrible," he commented.

"I _feel _terrible," came the mumbled reply.

"Did you sleep at all last night?"

"No. Does it matter?"

"To me it does." Chessur flicked his tail towards his front door. "You know, my place is always available if you need somewhere to stay."

Mally looked up at him.

"Sleep in a feline's den?" she said with just a hint of the usual tone she used around the cat. "I'm not _that _reckless, Chessur."

"For the thousandth time, I don't eat mice!" Chess playfully protested, his ever-present grin widening slightly.

"Now, if you were to make such a statement without showing off all your teeth…" Mally fingered the hilt of her sword and sighed.

"What the _henfan_ were you thinking, Chess?" she asked.

Chessur stretched lazily, although he was taking the topic very seriously.

"I went looking around," he said. "I saw enough to convince me that you were right about where our friends' hearts lay."

"And so you thought you'd just tell Tarrant, 'Your wife's in love with the Queen; go crash a wedding,' because the dormouse seemed to be right?"

Chess hissed at her bitter tone.

"The wedding was right then; there wasn't time to talk it over! You would have had me do nothing?"

"_Yes,_ do nothing! You're good at it, so why stop now?"

Mally knew full well the depth of that insult—her constant complaint about him for years had been that he'd stood by and done nothing when he knew that Witzend would be attacked—but she was too angry to care about the hurt in his eyes.

"The only one with a problem was _me_, Chess! Me!" she continued, tears running down her cheeks once again. "Now it's everyone!"

"Do you honestly think that Mirana and Raymond and Alice and Tarrant would have been happy if things had continued as they were?" Chessur demanded.

"They could have!" Mally wailed. "But now—"

The cat's paw shot forward, knocking the dormouse off the tree root and pinning her to the ground.

"Now you listen to me, Mallymkun," he snarled. "Maybe they could have. Maybe, in some alternate existence, they did find happiness. Maybe I didn't do anything about it, or you never told me, or you didn't care. _But what good does sobbing about that do you now? _All anyone can do now that has any chance of being productive is move forward from here. Mirana and Alice can take care of themselves and the politics, too, I'd wager. And Tarrant's no longer the man who spent a decade dwelling on the past. Time passes, things happen, people change. So grab your muchness back from wherever your self-pitying, depressed little heart has stowed it and work with what you have!"

Mally stared up at him with wide eyes and was silent for so long that Chess almost, _almost, _thought he'd overdone it.

Luckily for him, he ended up not having to reassess his status of never second-guessing himself.

"…I _have_ been quite the pitiful little thing, haven't I?" Mally said. Then she frowned. "Get off of me, you great lug."

Chessur removed his paw and Mally got to her feet.

"Work with what I have…" she muttered, looking down at her hands. "I should clean myself up, first of all."

"That's always a good place to start," the cat encouraged.

"And then—" Mally's planning was cut short by a wide yawn.

"A nap would be nice, too…" she continued, rubbing her eyes. "But I'm not sure what then. What do I do about…well…about my place in this mess?"

"You want my advice?" Chessur purred.

Mally shrugged. "I don't have to follow it."

"I think you should tell Tarrant how you feel about him."

The dormouse gaped. "Right after all this trouble I've caused him? He was so upset, Chess!"

"We're all going to be putting things back in some kind of order after this," Chess said. "In my opinion, it would be better to not have anything secret, especially if such a secret could become part of the new order."

Mally yawned again. "I'll sleep on it. See you around."

The dormouse turned and began to walk away, but then she stopped and looked back at the cat.

"You know," she said. "You're not the same cat I met all those years ago. You _do _more."

Chess shrugged. "People change."

Mally grinned. "Thanks, Chess."

"Good luck, Mally."

Chessur watched her until she'd disappeared into the trees, and then he slowly evaporated away, tail to torso to grin.

**XXX**

**A.N.: **My thanks go to jjhatter for the Outlandish word and Chessur's house, and to Alix Cohen for the quick betaread!


	8. Chapter 8

Tarrant stood with his back resting against the tea table, staring out over the trees at the distant horizon, his hands clasped behind him, thinking. Strange how quickly things could change. Events certainly seemed to wildly shift in his life. One day with a home and family, the next with burning remains. One day in complete despair, the next with the arrival of a heroine.

One day happily married, and the next…

Four days. It had been merely four days since what Underlanders were already referring to as the "un-wedding". A fitting name, the Hatter thought; since weddings bring people together, an un-wedding would surely be something that would drive people apart.

Hadn't he had it all right? There had been a beautiful, muchy woman who had cared for him, and he for her. He'd been certain that was what it took; it was what every person and story and song had said that it took. He'd _known _that she'd loved him…

_Ah, but was that really what you knew? _a nasty little voice in his head spoke up.

Those voices. They gave him so much trouble; they were a side effect of being mad.

But he had noticed that Alice wasn't happy, although he'd tried to convince himself that she was. In fact, she'd been happiest whilst at the White Castle, with the Queen… And then there had been the violet ribbon… That cursed violet ribbon…

Tarrant frowned. The voices were even more infuriating when they seemed to be correct.

_But where did I get it wrong? Alice and I… If that wasn't what love is, then what is love?_

The softest of noises reached his ears then. For most others, it wouldn't have come near to demanding notice, but it was a sound that Tarrant had heard many times in the past, and recently not at all. It was the light tap of tiny paws on a tabletop.

The Hatter quickly turned around. Sure enough, there Mally was, standing next to her teapot, looking up at him.

"Mally…" he whispered.

She gave him the smallest of smiles. "Hi."

Tarrant sat down in the chair directly across from the dormouse.

"Where have you been?" he asked. "I haven't seen you since…"

He let that sentence trail off, because the next three words were _before my wedding_, and that was not something that he wanted to have to think about. He'd been thinking far too much about it the past four days.

"I've been…around," Mally replied, sitting down with her back against the teapot. "This might be a stupid question, Tarrant, but…how are you feeling?"

The Hatter shook his head. "I'm feeling…too much, Mally. It's just too much. So much has just been…_flipped._"

Mally nodded slowly.

"Tarrant, I… I know you have a lot to deal with right now, and I hate to add to it, but…there are a few things that I have to tell you."

Tarrant's brow furrowed slightly, wondering what she had to tell him. "Go ahead."

Mally glanced down at her paws, hesitated, and then plunged right into her spiel.

"It was me who told Chessur that Alice and Mirana were in love. I discovered it by accident, since I was working there, and then when you married Alice I just… So please don't be mad at Chess for this whole mess, because it was my fault, not his. I was so upset when I told him, he actually took me seriously.

"But it wasn't just because I knew that Alice didn't… that she didn't love you. That wasn't why I was upset. You hadn't seen me because…because I was avoiding you. I couldn't handle being near you or Alice, not after you got engaged. I couldn't even come to your wedding. I couldn't come, because it hurt too much. Because… Because I love you, Tarrant."

She looked up at him, staring straight into his bright green eyes, so very wide on a pale face that didn't seem to know what emotion to arrange itself in.

"I love you," she repeated. "Things haven't been perfect for you and me; we've fought each other, we've struggled to survive together… but we've always come out all right in the end. And I've watched out for you, and you've watched out for me, and even though I didn't always like what you did for me, it was for my own good in the end, and I think that it's been the same with the things I've done for you. And best of all, the years I've spent with you have left me feeling more alive than I've felt since I was a pup. I'm in love with you, Tarrant; I have been for a long time now, and I believe that I will remain so."

Mallymkun got back to her feet, straightening her jacket.

"I'm not asking you for a response now," she said. "You could never give me a response, if that's what you decide. I'm just telling you, so that it's finally out there. Foolish or not, I'm done keeping quiet. So I'm going to leave now, and if you ever want to find me…Well, I won't be avoiding you. That's all."

The dormouse gave the Hatter one last smile, and then she turned, climbed down off the table to the ground, and walked off into the trees without turning back, leaving a very conflicted man still sitting there, wordlessly staring after her.

**XXX**

**A.N.: **At this point, I'm guessing two or three more chapters before this story ends...


	9. Chapter 9

The sword sliced through the air and slammed point-first into the target, sticking firmly. Mallymkun's critical eye swept along the blade and back towards the youth who had thrown it.

"Your arm is stronger," she observed. "There's more force behind your swing—but you've let your aim slip. You should be able to hit this dot every time." She reached down from her position on top of the target board and tapped her own blade to the small black dot at the center of the board.

"Don't just heave the sword at your target," she continued, straightening again. "Any half-good soldier can block a half-_scutted _strike. Attack with a _purpose. _Now do it again."

While the lad ran forward to retrieve his sword, Mally took a moment to scan the other recruits in the training yard. Some, like this one, were throwing swords and knives of various sizes at target boards, while others were striking at wooden or cloth dummies. In the center of the yard, four recruits had paired up and were engaged in duels with blunted practice swords. As the dormouse watched, one rather burly boy took advantage of his opponent's smaller, lighter stature and forced her to the ground with a shove, sending the girl sprawling in the dirt in one direction and her blunted blade flying in the other.

Mally sighed. "Practice that throw; I'll watch you later," she said to the nearer boy. Then she scurried down the target board and towards the dueling pairs. The girl was getting to her feet, brushing dust off of her clothes and scowling at her opponent.

"Jenx, come here," Mally ordered, hopping up onto a nearby wooden post. "Blite, take a round on the cloths, then come back."

The boy shouldered his blade and jogged off towards the dummies, and the girl turned to face Mally, pushing some stray hairs out of her eyes.

"That was cheating, Cap," she protested. "We're learning swordplay here, not roughhousing!"

"You're learning to fight, Jenx," Mally corrected. "Enemy soldiers and Outland beasts aren't going to play fair. You've been on my team for weeks now. Even with the break in training, you still should be beating Blite just as much as he beats you, if not more than."

Jenx crossed her arms over her chest. "How am I supposed to take him down? He can just shove me over. You saw. He's too big."

"Too big, hmm?" Mally placed her paws on her hips. "Do you always judge your opponents by their _size_, Jenx?"

The recruit flushed. "I didn't mean…"

"No. You didn't _think_. And you need to. Use what you have instead of focusing on what you don't have. So you can't shove him over. Why should he ever get the chance to do so to you?"

"Use what I have…" Jenx muttered, her forehead wrinkling slightly as she thought.

Mally nodded. "Now get back out there."

Jenx headed back towards her training weapon, meeting the returning Blite.

Overall, Mally was happy with her unit's progress. They were all much better fighters than they had been when the Queen had assigned them to her. Before the un-wedding, the dormouse had done some basic advising, but since the majority of the soldiers she had been working with had already been trained in either the Red or White Queen's army, her advise and style of combat had held little value to them.

_But Mirana must have seen some value in it, _Mally thought as she watched the two recruits begin to spar again, _since she gave me a unit of new recruits to train as I saw fit!_

Granted, it was a small unit. She had under her command twelve humans and three lemurs, and only one of them, the human Lysistra Jenx, was female. However, it was a job that took up her time and concentration. Handling fifteen adolescents was no small task, especially when it involved figuring out what their strengths were and getting them to use said strengths.

She'd been so busy these past few weeks, she'd barely even thought about Tarrant.

Blite let out a shocked yelp as Jenx ducked through his legs, tripping him. He fell flat on his stomach, and an instant later the girl was on top of him, pressing her sword into the back of his neck.

"You're dead," she declared, her satisfaction evident in her voice.

"Lucky…shot…" her defeated opponent gasped.

Mally slid back down to the ground, where she grabbed a pebble, turned, and threw it at a large metal bell hanging off to the side. At the resulting _clang_, all of the recruits set their weapons on the ground and stopped to listen.

"Water break," Mally announced. "Those of you on the targets: be ready for me afterwards. That is all."

_But what's there to think about, really? _Mally added to herself as her unit headed for the fountains. _I've told him everything. I haven't heard about any trouble, and the castle gossip is that there won't be any lasting damage between our kingdom and Purple, since Raymond's a basically good fellow, and it's not like Mirana's stopped being a good Queen since her love with Alice came out…_

"Having fun?" a voice purred.

"They're doing well," Mally replied. "Individually, they're improving faster than I expected they would. What they really need, though, is experience…"

Chessur stretched out behind the dormouse. "I daresay we've had more than our share of experience…"

"I meant in battle, Chess."

"I know."

"When did _you _ever engage in combat with anyone?" Mally asked, turning around and giving the cat an incredulous look.

"I never said I did."

"But you just said 'we'…" Mally shook her head. "Never mind. How's life in the Woods?"

"As normal as it ever gets," Chess replied, shrugging.

Mally nodded. "And…" She hesitated. "How's Tarrant?"

"Fine, as far as I can tell," said the cat. "He sent me here with a message, actually."

"A message?"

"An invitation, actually. He wants you to come over at your earliest convenience, for… Actually, I'm not sure what for, because he kept going back and forth about whether he wanted you for dinner or tea. Then again, it's always teatime at that table, so he probably meant tea in the evening."

"Did he say why? I mean…" Mally fumbled for the right words. "Did he…say what he wanted?"

"No, but he did warn me to keep away from the actual event, because it was none of my business." Chess's grin widened slightly. "But I can guess."

Mally frowned. "You'd _better _keep away."

"Oh, what kind of a 'thank-you' is that?" Chessur said, although his tone let the dormouse know that he wasn't really hurt. She turned to check on the recruits, a few of which were preparing to restart their training.

"Tell him I'll be there tomorrow night," she said.

"Will do," Chess replied. "I'll see you around…"

"But not _then_, Chess!" Mally insisted, but there was no response other than the disembodied chuckle of an evaporated Cheshire Cat.

**XXX**

**A.N.: **So, now you've been introduced to Unit M! At least, that's my name for them at the moment. It might change. Jenx and Blite and the others _might _get their own story sometime, depending on how my muses align. Their role in this story is complete for now…but there isn't much left in this story anyway.


	10. Chapter 10

The sun was low in the sky when Mally reached the clearing. She paused before approaching the table, peering out around a tree. Tarrant was already there, sitting in his usual chair with his chin resting in one hand in a ponderous sort of way.

_No good hesitating now, _the dormouse reproached herself. _I'm here to hear what he has to say, and I won't get that hiding from him. Whatever he's going to say, that is._

She hadn't dared try to guess _what _he was going to say. It had been easy enough to say that she'd come; convincing herself to actually go had taken most of the day. She'd caught herself wasting time trying to decide what to wear, of all things! As if she had a large wardrobe. In the end, she'd worn her usual breeches, white shirt, and red jacket. The jacket that he'd made for her, all those years ago.

The Hatter quickly lifted his head when he saw her coming, his hand falling to the table with a slap.

"Mally!" he exclaimed cheerfully. "Come, sit. You're just in time for tea."

Mally gaped for a moment. Never mind what she hadn't dared guess would happen; she hadn't expected _that _kind of greeting! She quickly shook off her shock and climbed up to her old seat. Best to go with the flow. Probably.

As she settled herself atop the skinny tower-like seat, she looked at what was on the table, and again found herself staring. The table was neatly set, and it was covered with absolutely delicious looking food. There were finger sandwiches and tarts, and even a cake. It was just like the first time she'd come to the tea table with Tarrant and Thackery, after convincing the Red Queen of her madness. In fact, if she overlooked the absence of the March Hare, whom she really wasn't sure where he was these days, it was exactly the same, as best as she could remember.

"Squimberry tart?" Tarrant offered, moving the platter closer to her.

"Yes, thank you." Mally stepped onto the table and pulled a tart off of the plate. She broke off an appropriately sized piece and took a bite. Tarrant took one of the pink-juiced pastries for himself, but then he stopped and stared down at it.

"You used to bring these berries back to me, in the years before Gribling Day," he said.

Mally froze. She tried to swallow the sweet tart, but her mouth had gone dry.

"That was a very strange time," the Hatter continued. "So much had gone wrong… It was like time stopped for me. But it didn't for you, did it."

That time. The Lonely Years. Years of hiding from Red Knights, of caring for an unresponsive Hatter, of living without any hope for the future.

Tarrant was looking at her now. "That must have been a very difficult time for you," he said, his voice low and soft with sympathy. "But you stayed nonetheless."

Mally shrugged, not knowing what to say and relieved that her full mouth excused her from answering.

_Why did he say that? Why bring that up? He's never talked about that time—I never dare to _think _about that time! Why bring it up now?_

But before she had to respond, Tarrant had abruptly switched back to cheeriness.

"Delicious!" he said, taking a bite out of the tart. "I've always liked these. But it's been so long since I've baked anything; I had to find Thackery to help me out. Took me ages to find that silly hare, and my kitchen was such a rathsty afterwards! I guess that's why I don't bake very much."

He flashed her a toothy grin, and Mally found herself resolutely gulping down the piece of tart and smiling back at him.

The evening continued in a very merry fashion. Tarrant seemed eager to engage Mally in conversation, and she gradually began to counter his banter and laugh at his jokes, bad though they often were. They talked about everything from the weather ("It's a bit warm for this time of year, yes, but that makes it much more comfortable to spend time outside." "True, but it will be nice once it finally snows.") to their old friends in the Woods ("The bloodhounds passed by the other day; those pups are growing so quickly, and they're the most energetic balls of fur you've ever seen!"), Mally's job training recruits for the army ("I think they're ready for real combat. There've been complaints from Iplam about Outlandish beasts crossing over; the Queen might send us to drive them out."), and riddles ("No, Tarrant, I still don't know why a raven is like a writing desk." "Neither do I! When we know the answer to that, then we'll know everything, now won't we?")

It wasn't just the table that was like the old days, Mally soon realized. It was everything. She felt like she was getting to know Tarrant all over again. When was the last time they'd just sat and chatted, leaving all troubles someplace far off as they laughed the hours away?

Too long ago.

_This is where I fell in love with him, _Mally thought suddenly as Tarrant stood up, his plate clear and the sun long since disappeared beneath the horizon. _Here at the tea table, me and a man who'd saved my life and I his, recovering from a war. That's what I fell in love with. That crazy man who taught me how to care again and who made me laugh even though I'd lost everything._

_Where has he been all this time? Where have _I_ been all this time?_

"Come along," the Hatter was saying, holding out a hand. "The stars are out and about; let's spy on their party."

Mally nodded and stepped onto his open palm, and he carried her into his house, through the halls to his bedroom. Then he set her down on the windowsill and leaned against the wall, his eyes trained on the heavens.

The dormouse looked at the sky. There were the stars, twinkling high above like they always had.

"Twinkle, twinkle, little bat, how I wonder where you're at…" Tarrant sung under his breath. Mally smiled to herself. That silly little song, that had helped them out so much in the past. What had gotten them together at the tea table in the first place.

"It was so easy back then," Mally said suddenly, surprising herself as her thoughts were voiced. Tarrant turned his deep green eyes down to look at her, silently waiting for her to continue.

"Everything seemed so…so simple, just sitting here being happy and free," Mally slowly went on. "You, and me, and Thackery… Sure, there was a war, but it always seemed to be somewhere else. Here, things were happy and simple. And then, after the war was over, that was when things became difficult."

She paused. "That doesn't make much sense, does it?" she asked. "You'd think all the troubles would have left with the Red Queen."

"She was a bringer of troubles, that she was," Tarrant said. "But life itself is full of troubles. Troubles with uncooperative weather, troubles with daily chores, troubles with other people… But if there weren't troubles, would we ever know what was truly good?"

Mally shrugged. "I guess not," she said.

Tarrant looked out across the clearing, off towards the distant horizon.

"You are in love with me," he said. "I thought I knew what love was, not too long ago. Now, I'm not sure. Things have changed so much; there have been so many new troubles… But I have been thinking, Mally, and there are still a few things that this mad mind of mine knows for certain."

He looked down at her again, and his eyes met hers.

"I know that I care about you very much, Mally," he said. "I know that I would do anything to help you. I know that you are someone who makes me laugh one moment and who makes me feel absolutely _gallymoggers _the next. I know that I can talk with you and fight with you and cry with you and just sit with you, saying nothing for the longest time, and take comfort from your presence. I know that throughout all of the hardships, all of the war, you've been there at my side, ready to help, always willing to do what needs to be done. I know that we were friends, and that distance after the war dampened that friendship.

"That is why I invited you here tonight. To see if all that was still true, if that friendship, that caring still existed somewhere inside of me. And it did, Mally. It does. I don't know if it's love; I don't even know if I'm ready to try to love again so soon, but I'd be willing to take things one step at a time, if that is all right with you. You are a very special dormouse, Mally. I'm willing to try, for you."

Mally felt like her heart was going to beat its way out of her chest.

_He'd be willing to try. To try, for me. It might end up as nothing. But it's a start. Oh, it's a good start._

"Of course it is, Hatter," Mally replied. "That is absolutely all right with me."

Tarrant grinned down at her, his white teeth glinting in the moonlight and his eyes reflecting the starlight as he set a hand down on the windowsill, palm-up. The dormouse set her paw in his hand, a smile coming easily to her face for the first time in many weeks.

On the roof above them, the Cheshire Cat stretched contently. He briefly considered dropping down and ruining the moment, for old time's sake, but he wisely thought better of it.

He'd meddled enough for one lifetime.

_Finis._

**XXX**

I just wanted to thank everyone who kept this story on their Alert list, even with the three-month gap between chapters. Everyone who read, everyone who reviewed…everyone who argued over the direction I took the plot (my first controversial story! I feel like I've accomplished something, haha)… To all of you, thanks.

I'll return to Mally and Tarrant and the other Wonderlandians eventually, but I think I owe my other stories some care first. See you later!

…

I wrote this chapter after listening to the song "Ready to Take a Chance Again" by Barry Manilow If you're interested, here are the lyrics:

You remind me I live in a shell,  
Safe from the past, and doing' okay, but not very well.  
No jolts, no surprises, no crisis arises;  
My life goes along as it should, it's all very nice, but not very good.

_And I'm ready to take a chance again,  
Ready to put my love on the line with you.  
Been living with nothing to show for it;  
You get what you get when you go for it,  
And I'm ready to take a chance again with you._

When she left me in all my despair, I just held on,  
My hopes were all gone, then I found you there.

_And I'm ready to take a chance again,  
__Ready to put my love on the line with you.  
__Been living with nothing to show for it;  
__You get what you get when you go for it,  
__And I'm ready to take a chance again,  
Ready to take a chance again with you,  
With you._


End file.
